Poking the Dragon

Poking the Dragon
An open letter to my nephew Chad Gervasio

Why an open letter?  Well, it's difficult to talk to someone who has blocked you at every turn and available way.  But considering the amount of anger I see festering and the probable outcomes... it's just that time again.

You were such a great kid when you were little.  Affectionate, friendly, curious and cute as a bug.  I have often wondered what happened to bring you to the point you've arrived at.  More to the point, I wonder just what your mother did to you to bring this about.  I don't know the exacts, but I can pretty much tell you when it began.  When you were 4 years old, and ending a visit to Grandma Rainy, you started to run to Jo and I both for hugs before your family left to head home.  Your mother stopped you in your tracks.  She told you that you were too old to give hugs and kisses anymore.  You were a big boy and big boys shake hands.

I remember the hurt and confusion in your eyes at that moment.  But you were obedient, and you did as you were told. I hugged you anyway and hoped that you would understand what I was trying to tell you.

Fast Forward to your teen years.  By then the distance was noticeable to all of us at the Roosevelt house.  That cute affectionate kid was gone, and we could only wonder where he had gone to.  And why.

The family aged, we grew further apart with each passing year.  By the time you hit adulthood, I truly had no idea who you were anymore.  The Family Feuds got initiated, and a lot of people got hurt, and some got disowned.  You stayed out of it for the most part.  Up until the infamous message to me to keep my distance from Lucy.  I pretty much knew who was truly behind these feelings on your part.  We both know it was Judy.  Money does horrible things to people, especially when jealousy and envy are added to the mix.  You had stayed out of the mess with Dan & Nita.  And that was for the best. And then you insisted on showing up on my radar. That was foolish on your part.

Add the whole 'Revenge' song to the debacle, and some pretty hard feelings got set in stone all around.  Making death threats on the Internet?  Doubly foolish.  But I think you came to realize that  and removed all traces of the song from said Internet.  Perhaps some common sense had finally kicked in, or perhaps someone finally got through to you the possible legal ramifications involved and just what you had handed to me.

I  heard about the recent interaction with Danny.  I can't say that I was surprised.  'You're Fat'.  Seriously?  I'm beginning to think your emotional maturity was stunted at 13.  It would explain a lot.

Yes, Chad.  My family is fat.  This isn't news.  But y'know the one thing my kids aren't.  They aren't bitter, like you.  And me.

You see, Chad.  You're only 16 years younger than me.  That's not a very large gap.  And trust me, living life as a bitter old man is a pretty lousy way to end up.  I can only imagine what demons you're trying to put to rest, probably some of the same ones I'm dealing with as well.

I don't have any easy solutions for you. I'm not sure there are any.  But opening the lines of communication would be a good start.